drunk on an empty stomach...

I finally realise how bad it is to drink too much alcohol on an empty stomach... the side effects last for days.... your stomach hurts.. your head hurts... terrible.. I tell u how things happen..

Yesterday Fri 17th March 2006, my boss decided to treat the entire company to drinks after work to celebrate the expansion of the company and also to have a get to know you session as we have newbies coming in... ok when he say that.. we didn;t realise it doesn't include dinner first... so we worked until about 6pm.. then we went downstairs where a cab is already waiting for us... the cab took us straight to No 5 Emerald Hill... then we sat down and here come the drinks straight away... at first my strategy was to go slow... so at least I dun have to drink so much... some of my collegues drank abit too fast so by the time I finish my drinks they are already on their way to a third drink... but anyway it still doesn't work in the end... hahaha.. I took beers, shots including one unknown shot which my boss ordered for everyone and one lychee martini plus one unknown wine which was supposed to be meant for someone else... but she left before the drinks arrived so I got the task of finishing that drink on behalf... duhz... I must have been pissed.... because by the time I left the pub I seem to be supporting a super heavy big head.. hahaha... anyway I managed to make my way back to dear's house... before falling onto the bed and a deep slumber...

Sat night dear and I went to meet Wenliang, Jesper and Ah Boon for drinks... i thought maybe I can still drink a little... wah.. decided after less than half a mug to give up becoz my stomach couldn't take in any more alcohol... horrible... i think my stomach is still churning with Fri night alcohol.. hahaha...

I am going to slp now... becoz my head is still very very the heavy.. nitez

nice wedding gown

Was surfing through the net... came across this gown... very beautiful.. but I doubt I will have a chance to wear it.. neither do I think I have the figure to wear it... but it is soooo beautiful isn't it... hahaha

photos of my studio apt

Photos of our studio apartment.. hahahaha

TV dramas & novels

Ppl always ask me why I like to watch TV dramas, movies or novels associated with love so much.... some tell me it pollutes my mind because it creates false images of a fairy tale love story where the prince and princess of the story lives happily ever after.... some tell me that such TV dramas and novels beautify love too much and that love isn't that beautiful in real life... it just make ppl lives in a unrealistic world of their own...

My point of view...

Yah such TV dramas, movies and novels do beautify love in a certain way to a certain extent.. come on la.. think abt it.. if a author or director is going to write or film abt a damn sad love story.... I seriously doubt many ppl will spend money to watch it... I know that all along...

Yap sometimes it does create false images resulting in a too dreamy me wanting to live in a happily ever after love story with no faults or downsides... ok I admit that sounds pretty bad and serious in my case...

But not all dramas, movies and novels create a happily ever after love story ma... some do show how difficult it takes for a couple to be together at last.. all the things that they went through together.. how they managed to cross all the hurdles... the conflicts, agruments and disagreements... those are things that we can learn and use it in real life isn't it... although the guy and the ger always seem to be better and more understanding than anyone else in real life la.. but but... I dunno... there are so much things that I realise and learn from such dramas, movies and novels.. maybe some good some bad... but it makes me realise alot of things too....

weekend over in a min..

I waited so hard and so long for my weekends... but it didn't even seem to last for one min before vanishing into history...

Actually we didn't do much over the weekends.. we nv really did much over any weekends.. Hahaha..

11th March 2006 Saturday
Darling got to work until quite late because got lots of shipments to clear.. so I was lazing around at home watching TV and basically doing nothing while waiting for darling to call... so finally he went off work around 3+ which he came over to pick me up before going for lunch.. poor darling.. didn't manage to eat lunch until 3pm in the late afternoon.. sad.. then we went home.. laze around for a while on the sofa that my darling just moved into his room... then we showered and then we went out again.. to IKEA.. to get a coffee table and a rug for the floor... in order to complete our living room... in the end we didn't get the rug becoz I think it is simply too big and ugly but anyway we ended up getting a photo frame for a huge size poster that I got for him. Then we went to Thomson for kampong chicken rice before moving the stuffs home.. Oh yah the kampong chicken rice was damn damn expensive.. duhz... then we assembled the table and hanged up the poster with the nice photo frame and finally we got our studio apartment nice and cosy looking...

12th March 2006 Sunday
went over to Darling's place early in the morning.. you know we lived so close to one another that we can simply just walk over to each other place.. hahaha... gd sia... anyway it took us the entire morning to clean up his room of all the useless junks and darling finally got an idea on how perfectionist I am in getting every single damn thing centralise, simple and nice looking.. hahaha... then after a hard morning of work we went to the market for lunch before heading home for a short nap... woke up just in time for dinner before shifting his computer to my house.. hahaha..

Boring right?? Nothing much actually but we just enjoyed spending time with one another... hehe

sat & sun....

Can't wait for Sat and Sun....
Can't wait to see U...

possesive mindset

I remember I read a book before that say "Love is the more you want to hold on to it, the more you will lose it. Therefore love is a balance between being possesive yet not losing it". Suddenly this sentence make some meaning to me. Sometimes the more you are afraid of losing something, the more tighter you try to hold on to it. The thoughts of holding on get stuck in your mind making you panic in your mind but not wanting to show out how afraid you are. You start picking stones from an egg. You become suspicious because every single little thing he do or say seem to hint you that it is the end of the relationship. You lose your trust, you lose your confidence, you lose your communication and you lose your committment. It makes you tired. In the end you are just a miserable wreck. The book in the end say "Sometimes humans should learn how to let go. Becoz only by knowing that you cannot hold on to things forever, then you will know how to let go and take things easily. This way there wun be anything in this world that you would want to hold on to".

Yesterday night I sat in my bed thinking to myself. Why do everyone say I am grumpy. Why do everyone say I complained about my work. I remember someone telling me this before: "If one ppl come and tell you you have a problem yet noone else say or think the same thing, the problem lies with that person becoz he has a problem with you. But if a lot of ppl comes and tell you the same thing that you have a problem, it means the problem lies with you not with everyone else". So this time it become my problem not everyone else. Maybe that is something I need to change. If not I will just be going round and round in the same cycle over and over again in life.

I am just a simple, easily contented, dreamy gal. I thought this is what you like me for. My best buddy told me this before: "Humans got to learn how to be selfish in order to survive in the complicated and confusing world". I guess I finally decide to learn how to be selfish. I finally decide I want to be selfish yesterday night. Why should I always be taking care of others feelings and happiness when they dun even care a shit about mine? Why do I have to make sure whatever I do, others will be happy? Why do I have to live my life the way they want me to live my life so that they can be happy?? I thought I say before I no longer wanna to compromise my happiness for others?? I do things for myself not for others, I live my life for myself not for others. Now I say I wan to be happy, noone else can spoil that except for myself becoz this is my life.

Be it that I am avoiding problems or what, I just dun feel the need of struggling in a puddle of rain water when it will sooner or later dry up when the sun comes out. And there is no way I can make the puddle of rain water dry out without the sun... struggling in it maybe just makes things worse by spreading it to more areas or bigger puddles.. so I choose to adopt the hack care attitude. I didn't get the best of both worlds becoz utimately both worlds still have flaws that I can't amend. But I shall not let the flaws affect me becoz sooner or later down the road I know it wun be there anymore... why do I have to make myself so unhappy about something which dun even reflect anything 10 yrs down the road?? Like I say before "Some things are just ants swimming in the ocean becoz 10 yrs down the road you dun even remember what happen". Call it avoiding I dun think so ba... call that simple minded... yah maybe I am... Just hide in my bubble with a protective armour where nothing can ever break through and I will be alright. You know just like the show "Bubble Boy" where Adam Sandler hid his life away in a bubble ball? I will just be that... When things happen, just throw it to the dumpster, be quiet, dun talk and carry on with my life... becoz it doesn't concern me much.... becoz I already hack care abt it... it wun affect me anymore becoz I choose not to let it affect me...

In my life, I choose the way I want to be happy... I choose to be happy... take it or leave it...

Easily contented in life..

Wah 3am in the morning liao.. fooked.. I still wide awake wor.. darling U dun scold me hor.. I guess I slept too much this afternoon that once again I am unable to sleep at night.. hahaha..

Looking back at all my archives just now.. too much blogs too lazy to read them one by one.. just manage to glance through most of them... wah I have been blogging for over a year le.. can U believe it?? Ddin't realise I have been blogging for so long sia... saw a couple of blogs which I think was rather silly.. I guess I did suffer a minor depression crisis when I was working in Delifrance is it?? Haha.. That is usually what happen where there are too much things on my mind...

Had a nice talk with my dear just now.. dunno why but these few days I kinda of got scared about losing him... had that feeling that he is just going to give up on this relationship... give up on all the promises he had made and most importantly give up on me... I think I have dumped in too much feelings to pull myself out now.. I am too deeply rooted in this relationship... had that feeling that I am trying so hard to hold on to a vanishing relationship and that feeling is certainly not very nice... it hurts... I guess I am one of the worst gerfrenz he can ever had.. frankly speaking I can't blame him too... can I?

What he say is true.. I have a dreamy character.. I knew it all along... that is because I am contented and satisfied with my life now... I have my family and most importantly I have him... I know no matter what he will always be there for me.. to protect me, to comfort me... sometimes when I am just so tired and pissed off from work.. seeing him and getting to hug him just lighten my mood and spirit.. every moment spent with him is a spa retreat of its own... those are the times where I can pull myself away from the confusing complicated world and enjoy myself in true serentity and bliss... we dun have to do much spend much really.. just spending time with him I am glad enough.. always treasure the moments with him.. love him so much....

Brain Dead

I am so TIRED until I dun wish to think about anything at all, I dun allow myself to think about anything at all and I dun want to think about anything more........ nothing goes in and nothing come out of it... the brain is just an empty nutshell... I am just a walking zombie...

What the hell is wrong???????? What the fuck is going on??

Feelings numb

Tears dried up

Brain dead

Officially announced dead on 3th March 2006 00.02am

But still loving you...

Quickie..

Haha.. I haven't blog for quite a long time haven't I?? Hmmm...

First of all I need to apologize to two persons... Junxian and Eyore.. so sorrie to infect you with a computer virus from my tagboard... it totally completely slipped passed my detection.. darlingz's office pc went down dragging the entire office network with it and until now I betted it still didn't manage to earn him a new PC to replace the old faulty one... hehehe.. Junxian.. thank god your office PC is alright man.... if not I dunno what would have happen with so much private and confidential data in your com.. can't think abt it... somemore your bank IT director must be screaming over its head because of the vast network your bank has and he/she need to protect... anyway I removed it... hahaha... no longer trust it to serve its purpose...

Ok Apologies done.. next for some updates.... what are the updates?? Me and my darlingz are so busy working until we didn't really have much updates also... duhz... hahahahaha... now you know why I haven't blogged for so long eh.... last Sat darlingz came and fetched me after work and we went back to his place to nua... then at night we are actually supposed to meet Shi An and Leon because it is Sai On's birthday but before that we made our way to Sembawang to meet WenLiang, Ah Boon, Ah P and Ah Xiong for dinner... stingray.. yummy... but the dinner is not nice because first the chilli is not hot.. second the stingray just dun taste nice... had a couple of drinks... beer of coz.... then has a slight disagreement over beer with my darlingz.. hahahaha.. aiyah we always have that... other couples always agrued over dunno what things we agrued over beer... not agruments just disagreements... we nv really have a big agrument before also.. because we always talk things over between us... by end of the day we will both realise we love each other too much to be angry over such petty things.. and things ended nicely with a hug and a kiss...hahahaha...

then Sunday I gave darlingz a surprise in the midst of his sub consicious.. hahaha.. he is awake but not fully awake yet... then both of us slept until quite late then went for lunch at Old market.. wanna to eat pork porridge.. but haiz.. woke up too late for it.. finished liao wor.. so we went for Lion City Teochew Noodles instead... after that went home slept for a while again after watching some TV... then woke up at 6+, his mum cooked fried rice so we ate a bit then we are off to JB for petrol.... met up with Ah Xiong and Wenliang on the way, went to JB together through the old causeway... headed for dunno dinner or supper.. hahaha.. ate stingray, mussels, prawns and vegetables for just hmmm $47RM... hahahaha.. that is only enough for one stingray in SG lo... pls.... after dinner we pumped petrol for darlingz's second wife.. then we came back to SG.. jam sia... but it was still ok... not really that terrible la...

Yesterday darling came and fetched me off work then we went for supper.. stingray again!!! Can U believe it.. hahaha.. darlingz scolded me for eating so many unhealthy food.. hahahahahaha... true true.. I promised him this is going to be one of my last stingray meal.. hehehe.. anyway darlingz brought me a Tigger figurine.. the same collection as the Eyore figurine that I brought him the other time..

k k enough enough got to rush to prepare my stuffs then go work le... haiz...

My Love for U

The first time we chatted, we seems like strangers... that weird feeling of trying to force the north and the south pole of the magnet together... after a few times of chatting, everything becomes more natural.. the topic that we clicked on?? Beer & alcohol... hehehe... you admit that you are a serious regular drinker and we agreed to introduce each other's drinking khakis to each other so we have a bigger gang of drinking khakis to mix around with next time... and we will ask each other out for a drink some day.. hehehe... because you wanted to see how well a ger can drink...I remember there was one time you message me while I am in Malaysia with my cousin from Australia and I didn't remember or know about your mobile number at all... after which it just happens that Ah Gong organise a gathering for WLNY ppl and i am one of the participants.. so I decided to ask you along.. to meet up with more ppl.. I went to meet up with Ah Gong, Alex and Yeeling for KTV while you just went off work and decided not to join us because you are tired... but you said you might be meeting us for dinner at Blk 19.. so when we went down to Blk 19 for dinner, you went to Yishun to meet up with ur frenz and missed dinner too... but as me and the gang were sitting at the old market chit chatting abt everything under the sun, you called me and asked us where we are and you will be coming down to meet up with us... Ah Ger and Ah Gong wanna to play match maker so they decided to shift places so that you will sit besides me... hehe..

I knew it was you when you were walking over... anyway there wasn't alot of ppl walking around there also since it is already so late.. hahaha.. so roughly also can guess it must be you.. as arranged you sat besides me.. but you were actually quite quiet.. maybe because you are not really familiar with the group yet.. except for me who you spoke to before.. hehehe.. felt strange to have you sitting besides me.. it is surely not love at first sight.. but somehow there is that kind of the funni feeling when you seems to know it might develop into something special.. that U might be the one.. I remember I asked you why you went down to Yishun, to pass what to your frenz... and I can smell the strong alcohol smell from you and i asked you if you already started drinking that early.. you gave me a smile in return... hehehe.. after everyone went off.. Ah Gong wanna send me home if you are not because it is already 12plus in the wee hours of the morning... but you said you will be sending me home.. hehehe.. but in the end we ended up going to Blk 211 to buy alcohol and going to the beach for more chit chat.. we are both quite shy at the beginning.. hehehe.. I really have to admit.. our first date?? Considered ba..

The next day you asked me if I have any plans for the night...I said no.. then we decided to go for dinner together... you came and fetched me off work.. hehehe.. asked me for the directions to Informatics Campus.. hehehe... we went to Blk 306 for Mackays.. hehehe.. after which we decided to go to the beach again for a drink of course.. we found out more about each other and realise that there are many things common between both of us... thinking wise especially.. hahaha... that was our second date.. the next day we didn't plan to go out or anything special... it was already night time and I got seriously pissed off abt something and called U to ask if U interested to go out for a drink... hahaha.. just happen that you wanted to message me too... hehehe... anyway U came over to fetch me and we went off to the beach... we grew close to one another and I guess at the same time we both realise that we have a bit of special feelings for each other... that night U wrapped your arms around my waist.. felt real sweet.. hehehe... that night you sent me some messages and I told you how I felt too..

As what U expected, it is a start of a beautiful relationship... the first day in our relationship, we met up for a drink at the beach... that time was awkard.. hehehe.. really... but after that we went to meet up with Leon and Sai On... you made your first appearance as my boyfrenz in front of 2 of my gd buddies.. hehehe.. we drank alot.. hehehe.. I can clearly remember you rubbing my hands.. and I guess I drank a bit too much and did something disgraceful in front of you.. hahaha.. you sent me home and hugged me... felt so blissful that time to have you by my side..

I remember at your chalet Ah Boon called me to tell me you are drunk..and yet you still insist of coming to fetch me from work.. silly boy.. hehehe.. you are so drunk that you keep on hugging on to me once I reached...you told me you are afriad that you will lose me.. and I reassured you I wun.. that was the first time I see you so drunk... you fell asleep and I stayed by your side for a while to make sure you are alright... and you woke up in the middle of the night not knowing what happens.. but I remember you hugged me and we chit chatted for a while before I fell asleep and U decided to continue drinking.. haiz.. you fell asleep besides me dunno when.. so sweet....such a nice day... nice memories..

There is just so much of you... so much memories of you... I love ya so much.. I really hope I can continue to have nice memories of you many years down the road...continue to feel safe and blissful in your arms forever... Can't imagine what to do without you...

Photos2

Haha.. delayed posting of the photos from Malaysia & Sentosa trip.. hehehe... Sorrie sorrie... here you are...

My outfit for the reunion dinner...chio bo?? Haha


Sentosa Flower Festival


Flowers!!! Nice Nice...





Me & a RA statue


Me & Dear Dear

Follow Up...

hehe.. Ok continue from my last post... hehehe... yesterday rushing out to go Katong on a house visit with my mum to one of my relative's house.... hehehe..main purpose is of course due to the Chinese New Year.. secondary purpose is to take my relatives' full chinese names in preparation for one of my elder cousin's wedding.. the names are needed for the wedding invitation cards... hehehe.. Dunno why I got involved in my elder cousin's wedding in the first place.. it is not my wedding wat.. hahaha.. anyway can help help lo.. it is quite grand.. the wedding is held in the ballroom of the one and only 4 star hotel Katrina Hotel in Batu Pahat... costs a bomb... hahaha.. as my cousin is marrying a Korean-American.. they need two MC one chinese and one English.. and I got the role of the English MC.. hahaha.. sounds fun.. hehehe... I shld learn from my cousin's wedding.. so next time when it is my turn.. I wun make it as messy as her... so many things to prepare and arrange.. and so much money going out but not in... hahaha... but I seriously can't wait to get married.. hahahaha.. U know that blissful feeling of getting married to someone who U want to spend the rest of ur life with..?? hehehe... that smile just hang on your face... even going through all the trouble dun seem to be any hassle at all... when it is my wedding.. I want to plan everything myself.. hehehe... I learn events management before.. and having so much experience in helping out at other ppl weddings.. I will surely make sure I have my perfect wedding.. small sweet simple but memorable... dun need to be in any big ballrooms of any grand hotels blu blu blu.. hehehe.. anyway me and my darling already saw this wedding guest book that we wanted to get liao.. haha.. wait wait wait.. ahaha.. still long la.. kaos... everyone keep asking us when we want to get married.. kaos.. we just started only lo.. hahaha...

Anyway for the past few days I am staying over at my darling's place.. so sweet to spend so much time with him in and out together... but time really passes very fast... haiz... can't bear to leave my darling's side and start work tomolo again....

27th Jan - 31th Jan
Went back to Batu Pahat my grandpa & grandma kampong to celebrate the Chinese New Year.. haven't been back for so long... especially during the Chinese New Year period because everytime we think about the Woodlands Customs super long jam, we sianz half le.. but this year die die make our way back.. couldn't get any bus tickets so we took a cab back... but luckily we managed to reach there just in time for the reunion dinner... on the first day of Chinese New Year, all my relatives from all over Malaysia started to arrive back.. due to the lack of rooms, my family shifted to a hotel down town.. hehehe together with 3 of my aunties.. wah havoc sia... all the gossips start passing around le.. heheheh.. then we have a reunion dinner at a restaurant down town on the second day of Chinese New Year... hehehe... as I am making my way to my uncle's car, I bumped into one of my USQ school mate from Australia... arghhhhh.. the world just went crazy sia.. he is very close to me in Australia.. hehehe... hahahaha... I mean I nv thought I would bump into him U know.. becoz he lived in Pontian worked in KL.. I nv thought he would be in Batu Pahat for a gathering with his frenz... he invited me for a drink just like the old times in Toowoomba Australia.. but I need to go back to my grandma's place so I say byez to him.. we promised to keep in contact thou... hehehe.. we were both so surprised and shocked to see each other.. haha.. the world is just so small sometimes.. hehehe.. the next day we drove out to SG.. got stuck in Johor for 2 hours.. but in the end we managed to get out still.. thanks god..

1st Feb 2006
Brought my auntie, uncle and their kids to Singapore Science Centre with my mum... but I met up with my darling early in the morning.. he is so sweet u know.. he woke up especially early in the morning just to send me to Yishun Polyclinic for a checkup at 8.15am in the morning... hehehe... then we went for breakfast at Chong Pang.. so happie to see him again after that few days being away from him.. hehehe.. then he drew the directions for me knowing that I am a idiot when it comes to driving and the roads in SG.. hahaha.. then he went back to orh orh while I set off to Science Centre.. hahaha.. but I tell U I am a idiot right? I lost my way even with the directions that he provided.. hahaha... so I kept on calling him for help.. hahaha.. sad case sia.. hehehe.. we finished the Science Centre trip at around 6pm then we made our way back to Causeway Point for dinner at Kampong Days... after dinner dear dear came and fetched me to his place... so glad to be able to hug him to sleep.. i actually have a lot of things to tell him.. but I fell asleep I guess.. hahaha.. too tired...

2nd Feb 2006
Woke up very early in the morning.. because dear dear need to go make his airport pass.. actually I am supposed to go with him in the morning.. but when we woke up in the morning darling say he go alone wor.. and asked me to continue to sleep... he will rush there and rush back asap.. give me a peek on the cheeks before he left.. then I fell asleep.. hehehe... after he came back we showered and rushed back to my place.. because we are going to bring my relatives to Sentosa.. hahaha.. darling is the co-driver this time.. after the mess I made yesterday.. hahaha.. I decided it will be better if he give the directions himself.. hahaha.. it is also the first time my darling offically made an appearance in front of my family.. hehehe... he was so worried abt it.. but hehe... the day turns out well I guess.. we both enjoyed ourself.. and I think he perform real well.. hehehe like acting he told me.. hehehe.. then we came back becoz little baby Brandon fell asleep... I bet he was too tired.. hehehe... we went to Sakae Sushi for dinner.. then dear dear came and fetched me to Uncle Colin's chalet at Pasir Ris where we see baby Melson again.. my darling's baby.. hehehe... reached back home abt 1am or 2am in the morning.. fell asleep soon after

3rd Feb 2006
Oh we slept real late sia... 2pm in the afternoon... both of us woke up real tired and "nua"... hahaha.. I guess we overslept.. too much over the limits.. went to old market for lunch.. not much stores was open anyway due to Chinese New Year.. then we went back home and laze around.. hehehe.. then in the evening we went over to his auntie's place for dinner.. then rushed back to Wdl Partyworld to meet up with Xiang Ling, Ah Gong, Junxian and Maggie for KTV.. sang until abt 1am.. then went for supper at Grand City... dun need to say.. we fell asleep like pigs when we reached home.. hahaha

4th Feb 2006
Woke up around 10am because I need to come back to go house visiting with my mum... darling woke up with me because he need to send me back.. hehehe... then I went house visiting while darling went to Johor with ah Xiong to pump petrol... then we went to meet Ah Gong, Junxian and guys at Chong Pang for dinner.. I am still not done yet so I missed out on the dinner part... when I reached back at WDL darling already at Ginza.. so I decided to take a bus to Chong Pang to meet up with him... while he walked out from Ginza to the bus stop to fetch me.. hehehe.. then we drank and drank... haiz.. a lot of funni things happens... too much to be written down one by one... hehehe... we left around 12am because I am tired.. and darling is a bit tipsy topsy.. hahaha.. talks rubbish whenever he is like that.. hehehehe... but we managed to reach home safety and a day is over just like that... hehehe.. I miss him so much....wishes to spend every single min with him...

Quick Blog...

Ok let do a quick one.. actually I have alot of things to write... alot of things to update in this scrapbook of mine... but I got no time.. hahaha... if not I am just too lazy and tired to do so...

Anyway today is the eve of Chinese New Year and once again I will be leaving my precious dear dear to go back to Malaysia.. first it was Korea now it is Malaysia.. but we got no choice have't we??? Dun wan to imagine the horrible jam at Johor Causeway... haiz... every year you face the same old thing over and over again... duhz... but this year becoz of my grandpa.. die die also must make our way back home for the reunion dinner... woke up damn early this morning to pack all my things... actually it is partly also becoz i got a stupid running nose that's why I woke up so early...

Previously I met up with my poly mates.. the first thing that everyone is asking everyone is when is everyone getting married.. hahaha.. I think when we reached this kind of age, that is the typical question that get shooted into your face everytime.. I am prepared for that question too when I go back to Malaysia... my grandparents, uncles and aunties will be so anxious to know if I have a bf, what is he doing, how old is he, when we are getting married and when we are going to have kids.... the most impt thing I guess all of them are trying to guess is if I will be having a shot gun marriage.. hahaha.. too bad... they waited too long for the bad news... and it is still not happening yet... anyway I am glad all my poly mates are doing fine.. hehehe... we only have one gathering once in a year so we kinda of treasure it more...

To my darling...
I am soooooooo going to miss ya... but remember what I have been trying to nag at U the entire of yesterday night k... dun smoke too much while I am not around to keeep a lookout on U hor... hehehe.... will sms u whenever I can.. and I got a surprise for U in your wallet... hehehe.. so conduct a search for it k?? hehehe.. muackz.. I love ya....

Seeing me in someone's arms

I just read this email that a frenz sent to me a few days ago... it talks about this couple... the gal was involved in an accident and was seriously injured and unconscious... the boy was besides her all along... hoping and praying that she will be awake someday and after waiting continously for a few months, God was touched by him and offered him a deal.. he will become a dragonfly for 3 yrs in exchange for the gal's life.. which he agreed. He was always there besides the gal, silently accompanying her... but after the 2nd year, there was a new guy besides the gal who happens to be the doctor who healed her. The dragonfly was very upset.. and on the last day of the 3rd year period, the gal got married to the doctor... the email ended with this sentence "There are some relationships that was fated to have no endings, there are some relationships that was fated to be lost. Loving a person doesn't mean that you have to hold on to him/her, but having the person, you got to make sure you love him/her properly". 有些緣份是註定要失去的﹐有些緣份是永遠不會有好結果的。愛一個人不一定要擁有﹐但擁有一個人就一定要好好去愛他.

After reading this email there are some words that came up to my mind which I need to say to the two important persons who once make an impact on my life....

I am sorry I hurted U
And I know it hurts to see me in someone else's arms
But U know that we are not right for one another no matter how much we try to compromise for each other.....
And U told me before you so much wanted me to be happy....
I sounded selfish but I know one day U will find ur true happiness also..
And till then, I will give U my true blessings...
Knowing that U are happy too..
Thanks for all the memories..

Ginger Tea & Flu...

Holding on to a hot cup of ginger tea besides me now trying to prevent myself from getting a flu.. hehehe.... just putted down the phone with my darling deary who urgently need to go to sleep because he need to be in camp tomorrow at 9am to disarm. Then he will have to go down to Changi to get his staff pass done. As for me, I am supposed to wake up at 9am too (asked my darling to give me a morning call tomorrow when he reached camp) because I need to go to the doc for my semi annual blood test... hahaha.. then maybe go photocopy all my resumes and certs because I have an interview at NUH tomorrow at 4.30pm, get some undies and I need to do something else which I can't remember what is it now.. hahahaha.. sad case... my memory is just failing me isn't it?? Oh I need to wash my slippers and my shoes which I haven't got the chance to do so... hardly spend time at home now... I am either at work or I am with my darling...spent most of my free time with him yet we still both think it is so not enough... hahaha.. he blamed me for his flu... I blamed him for all the silly things that he do... but that is what is so cute abt him.. he is just like a small little kid to me.. and I am just like a small little ger to him... in front of me u will see a totally different guy.. a guy who know jolly well how to sulk and grumble in a cute way to try and get his way through.. hehehe... we both agreed that this blog should become like a scrapbook for both me and him.. because since our memories are so poor... maybe 10 days, 10 months or 10 years down the road.. we can't even remember what happen previously.. at least we can still look back at this blog (provided it is still there) and remember all the small little details that contributed to our lifes.. hehehe.. there is just so much that we want to do.. but we just keep on postponing it because we do not have the time.. haha.. swimming and playing badminton are one of those things on the list...let see what happe previously...

12th & 13 January 2006
Can't really remember what happen.. i bet darling must be in camp and I must be working.. hehehe..

14th January 2006
Met up with darling for lunch at blk 166.. it is the 1st or the 15th of the chinese lunar month therefore I need to eat vegetarian food.. so blk 166 is the only neaby kopitiam that offered veg food... hehehe.. anyway we met up abt 1.30pm... then after which we went back to darling's place for a rest and nap session... then after being woken up by Ah Qiam, Ah Boon and Wenliang because they jio us to drink at Ginza.. hehehe.. we haven't been down to that place since Christmas.. hehehe.. anyway darling's mum cooked our favourite dish "bittergourd with egg" and sardines.. so we ate dinner before we went out to meet up with the rest of the guys around 8pm... when we reached there.. only Ah Xiong, Ah Boon and Wenliang were there together with Celest.. hehe.. the 3/4 Martell that was left over during Christmas was once again on duty.. hehehe... mission was to be completed by end of the day.. so the guys started with Dai Di.. hehehe... which was not my favourite because I am damn lousy at it.. but anyway darling's hands was damn poor that day because he nv got any of the biggest cards which is a 2 at all... his cards were all damn small and miserable... so I took the cards for him.. hehehe... I am damn toopidz at this game.. I can never game even though I always get gd cards.. hahaha... so ended up I took the cards for him but he was the one playing the game.. hehehe.. the tables has turned baby.. hehehe.. then they switched to bluff.. hahahaha... dear was playing it at the beginning while I am just watching... then dear went to the gents and asked me to took over.. hahahaha... I am becoming super gd at it.. heheh.. Ah Xiong and Ah Boon both got a taste of my terror.. hahaha... then it is me vs Wenliang!!.. hahaha.. but anyway I didn't lose much anyway.. hehehe... finshed up the Martell well before Junxian comes.. continued on to beer.. then I got to be on my way home le... as it is already 12midnight so darling sent me home on the bike.. hehehe...

15th January 2006
Oh Oh.. this day is special for both of us.. because we went on our first overseas road trip.. jotted it down jotted it down.. hehehehe... we crossed the causeway and went to Malaysia.. the main purpose was to go there and pumped petrol of course.. but anyway we are both very excited abt it.. hahaha.. deary came over and fetched me in the morning.. we went over to his place for a short nap while waiting for Ah Xiong to finish washing his bike... the weather looked bad like it is going to rain any minute so we are also not very sure if we should risk going into Malaysia.. so we waited until abt 6pm.. then as we are both hungry.. we decided to go down to Old WDL central for dinner while waiting for Ah Xiong to confirm with us if he want to go into Malaysia.. anyway we need to change some RM also.. so we changed our money... then we headed to Mackays to try the new Fan-tastic burgers... they were ok... but not really fantastic though.. but they are damn filling.. because they are made of sticky Japanese style rice.. hahaha... then Ah Xiong called to say we will use the Tuas second link and arranged for a place to meet... so at about 7.10pm we set out for the beginning of our first road trip overseas... but first we made a detour to Shell station to pump a little bit of petrol.. met up with Ah Xiong at 7.50pm.. then we went in.. it was a smooth clearance... Ah Xiong was speeding like crazy (160+??) and dear was super pissed because his bike can only clock to a max of 118 max.. hehehe... we went to eat herbal chicken which was yummy... I always loved Malaysian food.. then we came back using the WDL Checkpoint after getting their ciggies and pumping a full tank of petrol... end of a tiring day.. hehe

16th January 2006
Hmm.. what happened on 16th?? I think darling was in camp and I was working from 3 - 11pm.. but there was some delays at the workplace resulting in me only able to leave PS at around 11.30pm.. darling is already so tired because he got not enough sleep... and I felt so guilty for making him wait outside for me for so long... even though he kept on reassuring me it is alright.. hehe...

17th January 2006
Darling was in camp until 7pm.. I am at work from 3pm to 11pm.. then darling came and fetched me off work at 11pm.. although we finished real early today because it is Kenji's shift... we finished closing at about 10.30pm and Kenji asked me to go out for supper together with his gf Jane and our baker Jeffrey which I so much wanted to go because I wanted to eat clams and mussels (lalas with extra chilli)... hehhee.. but I know darling is tired.. so by dragging him to supper mean he will get home later and get even lesser sleep so I decided to forgo supper.. anyway we have plenty of time to eat it next time anyway... so I stood outside and waited for him until 11pm... then we came home.. passed him some ginger tea and medicine for his flu... then we spoke on the phone after I showered and he was grumbling abt me not spending enough time with him at night... and that's why he got a flu.. hehehehe... because I am not there to cover the blanket for him...

Stomachache

Oh... having a stomachache right now... I haven't update my blog for quite some time right? No leh... only less than one week ago ba.. why I feel like it has been so long leh?? Look like the blog have become quite a part of my life le.. hehehe

My dear is in camp for reservist.... sad le... have to wait until Sat before he can be out from camp... can't wait for Sat to come.. but anyway he might be able to come out tomorrow night so most likely he will come and fetch me off work at 11pm.. hehehe...

Ok what's been happening since my last blog.. I need to recap sia.. my memory is failing me.. I can't even remember what happen on Mon... OMG....

6th December 2006
Can't remember what happen...

7th December 2006
Can't remember too.. hahaha....

8th December 2006
Dear dear went to camp... and I think I went to work... Oh yah.. I went back to Informatics in the morning at 9pm to return my keys and my staff pass... then met up with some ex-collegues for a smoke and a bit of chit chat.. then I rushed down to Ngee Ann City for a appt of mine... then off to Paragon in the rain to transfer some stuffs then to work at 1pm to 8pm.. then dear dear called me to tell me he is able to book out that night so he came and fetched me home on his bike.... Okok I know I know after much persuasion.. I decided to sit on his bike.. so we went down to BLk 211 for dinner... then we went home because we both very tired... hehehe


9th December 2006
Ok dear dear is not working.. I am not working too... But what did we do? Hmmm... I think dear went to wash bike with Ah Xiong and Jinlong in the morning around 11am while I stayed at home... then I decided to go out to the library to realise that the library is closed on public holidays... duhz.. I was pissed abt it... then I went to buy my printer ink which is super expensive.,... $45 bucks for the black ink cartridge... then went to rent some shows and went back to my darling's place to watch the show that he always wanted to watch "Shen Hua". But I think we fell asleep half way throughout the first disk.. sad case... then I think we woke up and went out to Blk 883 for dinner.. yummy.. Tom Yam soup and pineapple rice again... then we went to Mustafa Centre to get some stuffs for darling's bike and went back... took the bike out for a ride.. hehehehe... blow air.. hehehe.. but I am in shorts so darling very scared i cold.... he was stroking my feets in order to give me some warmth.. so sweet of him... then he sent me home and just outside my door he realised that one of my earrings is gone!!! but becoz it is very late le.. so he asked me to go in first.. and he will help me to look for my earrings.. and poor thing he was really looking onto the floor for my small tiny earrings... but he found it on the ground next to his bike... oh my god.. hehe he know I really love the earrings alot... and trust him to even notice that my earrings are gone.. hahaha

10th December 2006
Rainy day again as usual... darling went out with Ah Xiong to change his bike's tyres as they are spoilt... then he ended up changing his brakes' pads as well... toopidz previous owner sold him a lousy second hand bike... in the end so much things need to be changed.. and it costs more money than buying a good bike... anyway.... I went out to the library to get some books as well as to DBS Bank to process some transactions on my account... then darling called me to tell me that he will be going down to Tuas at 1+ becoz Kelvin met up with an accident and they need to go down to help him out.. so I thought it is ok.. I let him go.. while waitinffor him in the library.. then the next thing U know I looked at my watch it is already 4+.. half a day is gone and he is still not done yet... I got pissed... but I dun want to disturb him.. so I didn't message or called him but I am super pissed and fed up... then he called me to tell me he is on his way home so I went and met up with him at his place.. it is raining like crazy so he couldn't come and pick me up on his bike and he know I wun sit on it too... so when I met up with him.. being my darling he know straight away that I am super pissed out abt something.. and he certainly know what it is... so he apologised to me.. how can I bear to be angry at him for long.. after a while we were ok... hugging and snuggling in bed... hehehe... sweet then we fell asleep again.. duhz.. actually he fell asleep first then I decided to take a short nap too.. hahaha... then we woke up at around 7+.. went out to blk 19 for dinner... then home again for a while.. actually want to take the bike out for a ride again but toopidz weather... it start to rain again so in the end he took the van and drove me home... hehehe...

End of my boring life..

First week of 2006

Yesterday was my last day at work.... had a small lunch gathering with some of my closest collegues which include Shiwei, Thomas, Tim, June, Lay Yong etc in the office on Thurs. Did Delifrance catering, Canadian Pizza delivery and me and Ms Teo went out to get drinks, paper plates, plastic forks and a cake to celebrate Sharifah's birthday at the same time. The gathering was nice and happy... hehehe... Although I think I wasn't a very good host really.. hehehe... too much ppl for me to entertain.. lost focus...

Then Fri I was busy trying to clear all my barang barang from the office. Two bouquets of flowers, lots of soft toys which include a teddy bear from Ms Teo for Christmas and a pair of Piglet slippers from Sharifah plus all my food stuffs which I have stocked up after half a year. Also trying to clear my work and emails to make sure no backlogs was left behind for Ms Teo and Sharifah... not very sure if I have cleared all though because too much cases... some I dun even remember what are them abt... But at least most of them have been cleared I guess.. Dear dear came and fetched me off work... because first it was raining secondly he know I have lots of barang barangs to carry...

Today I have my first taste of freedom.. hehehe.. offically declared jobless.. hahaha.. me and dear we went gai gai again.. went to visit my ex staffs at Bugis Delifrance... went to the Guan Yin temple at Bugis to pray pray because Darling just got his X9 bike today!!! hehehe... pray pray that he will be safe and sound... Then we walked walked around Bugis for a while..went to eat Dear's favourite food... then went down to Suntec continue walk walk... then went down to Lawrence's Bistro Delifrance store for some chit chat plus coffee and tea.. hehehe... wanted to have desserts but I guess me and dear are too full from our dunno lunch or dinner at Bugis...

Dear planning to get a raincoat and a helmet for me so that I can ride on his bike.. hmmm... I promised myself ever since my closest god-kor kor died in a moterbike accident a few years ago that I will never sit on a bike again... got a phobia of bikes just like someone being scared of water after nearly drowning before.... after that accident I think bikes are so so so unsafe... I mean yah I am woried abt my dear riding a bike too.. but first he loves bikes, secondly he need a better and more efficient transport to work... so haiz... got to let him get the bike... but me myself riding on it... eh.... I think I still need some time to convince myself that... I think my god kor kor from Heaven above will sure keep a watch out for me... I think i will make myself look funni also considering I haven't ride a bike for so long... OMG.. and I hate riding bikes on rainy days becoz I hate wearing the toopidz raincoat which makes me look like a clown.... OMG can't think abt it...

Simple Things In Life

Humans sometimes got to learn to be contented with the simple things in life... Yes money is very important in the Singapore society, you can't basically live in this world without money but it is not the most important thing in this world I suddenly realise... there are so many things that money can never buy.. like true love, laughter etc... there are thousands of millionaires or billionaires out in this world... they have the biggest landed properties, nice houses overlooking magnificant views, all the diamonds they ever wanted, the branded goods, the fame, best holidays, private islands, nice penthouse offices etc... but they may still lack the most basic and simple things in life like love and laughter... half the times they are stressed over work... or even buried in work.. people are frenz with them because of their money not because they truly like them as a frenz... they might even have lost the word laughter or smile in their dictionary.... how pathetic can it be? Yet they have all the things that thousands and millions of people are chasing after.... I too wanted the best things in life, nice holidays etc.. but I dun think I will ever give up anything in exchange for it because it is not worth it... Buddhism taught us that in this world, in this life, we come into this world with nothing... and we will leave with nothing... there is nothing in this life that is precious that we can hold on to... but I hold on to some of the precious things to me in life.. my family, my relationships, my frenz and my life... other than that.. nothing is that important anymore...

I have a frenz who ask me to join his company in the hopes of making more money so I can live a better life... probably own a car, stay in a condo, go for expensive luxurious holidays... I admit I was tempted at the first thought of it.. but come to think abt it.. do I need it? I am happy with what I have now... yes humans are always greedy... but I am happy with what I have and I am contented with it...my deary boyfrenz, my family and frenz... and I surely wun go against my own principles in sales to achieve my targets giving up precious relationship with frenz and family members just to achieve my own goals in life..... afterall frenz and family will always be there for U.. money U can always do with less of it...

Rich people might have the biggest parties in the hippest disco or pub in town with all the famous celebrities and people attending it in branded gowns and sparkling jewellery... but I am contented and happy drinking with my group of frenz at a chalet with no special countdown or fireworks.. just laughter accompanied by the hugs and kisses of my beloved deary plus the gentle touch of his arms around me.. what else can I ask for..

New Year 01.01.06

Yippess!!! Welcome to year 2006. Let hope this year will be a better year for all.... heehe... and especially for me of coz... hehehe

31th December 2005
Went over to dear dear's place in the afternoon after finishing some household chores at home.... dear dear walked over from his place to pick me up... hehehe.. I was taking a leisurely walk over, he called me on my mobile and I didn't hear.. hehehe... but anyway we met up and went up to his place... lazed in the bed the entire afternoon eating jelly beans and watching boring TV shows.. hehehe.. then we took a short nap and the next thing u know we woke up around 7pm.. then dear went shower while we waited for JX to give us confirmation on our tiuz.. at first supposed to go over to Litque's chalet at Chervons then we decided to go to Cosy Bay instead... then Litque called us and told us that there was quite little people at the chalet so we decided to go down and support him.. hehehe.. but first we picked up Alex at blk 17, then Wenlin at Sembanwang then we headed to Blk 925 Yishun to meet Junxian, Ah Xiong and Jinlong for dinner.. Then Wenlin ordered beer.. then all started drinking le.. haiz...in the end we had 4 bottles of beer in total at the coffeeshop.. hahha.. then after dinner.. we drove down to Chervons with two bikes following behind us... hehehe... becoz we are leading the way...

Reached Chervons le at around 10+.. quite late le... played around with the kids, watched TV for a while.. took a walk around the place... actually we are looking for a place to drink some more.. hehehe.. then me, dear and Wenlin drove out to 7-11 to get some mixers for Volka.. we got coke, green tea and 7up.. hehe.. then drove back and we started drinking... yippess.. hehehe.. at first just drink no game.. then Junxian suggested we play "Zhong Ji Min Ma" so we got the game rolling.. so funni... then we shifted outside becoz got Zhiwei's baby sleeping in the chalet.. then we continued the game. By that time, Wenlin is already half drunk and when someone is drunk... everything get funni.. hahahaha.. then we left the chalet at abt 3am in the mrning.. luckily dear still can drive and we didn't kana any roadblocks on our way back.. hehehe..then we got back to dear's place and slept until 12noon this afternoon.. hehehe...

Final conclusion.. it is a nice start for the year 2006.Some nice photos to share..

Alcohol and more alcohol over the New Year!


Me & my darling 1st full length photo..

Darling trying to act dao...

Nice one... hehehe... love his smile

A nice photo underneath a blur image

Last one!!!