Wah my last post is more than 1 mth ago.. that's long...
Anyway I just finished an documentary on Arts Central called "The Human Spirit". Today episode "The Man With No Face".
Looking at him, I really pity him for all the things that he had to go through... to cope with the illness is already bad enough, he still have to cope with other people's stares and extreme behaviour... you will have to be mentally strong to cope with all these and not go into depression.... you have to keep telling yourself it's okay.. you wun have to bother with what people say or think.. you just have to be yourself..
Dar asked me "how come you always like to look at such documentaries".. actually I also not sure myself.. my best answer will be that "only looking at such documentaries, I can tell myself that there are other people out there who are suffering more than me.. and I am already one of the lucky ones... and I should be glad for it.. hahaa"
My mum always used to tell me "you are already quite good le.. what about those handicapped / disabled people who cant hide any of their disabilities.. at least you can hide under a shirt / a dress".. that's true.. there are alot of people out there who cant hide and they have learned to cope with people's stares... and move on with their lifes.. why cant I??
When I went back to my primary school after two months hospitalisation leave, I was named / called FREAK.. I dun even know what I did / said to deserve that label of FREAK... on the exterior I dun look any difference before and after I do my operations.. it is just that I am exempted from PE lessons and all the teachers are extremely careful with me, afraid of tiring me out, afraid of stressing me out, afraid of touching me for fear that my spine / body might hurt... other than that I am perfectly normal and looks normal... and I insists to even my parents to treat me like a normal person... but just from that, everyone in school treat me like a freak..I go to school alone.. noone want to walk with me... everyone stand one arm length from me when we line up for national anthemn, noone eats with me during recess, noone wanna sit with me in class or at the hall.. best... seriously a primary 4 kid having to deal with all this.. at the time when you really wanna make frenz.. I am really surprised I went through that from primary 4 to primary 6... hahaha I cried (which is all I can do).. seriously I dunno how I did it...
But anyway somehow that piece of memory was blocked in my brain.. that period is like a blank space in my biography.. sometimes they said our brains will automatically block the unhappy moments and only allow the good memories to remain.. how good... hahaha.. anyway I survived and there are indeed people with worse fate out there.. these people have to face with it everyday... people staring at them wherever they go... I hope they have the courage to move on and be themselves regardless of whatever that happens.. because life is precious and is meant to be lived...
