Quite accurate personality test results...

You are Orange Panther, who is emotional and gentle, but are also fragile and have graceful atmosphere

Inside, you are rather proud, and have inner strength.

Your personality is passionate, and will not give up what you have decided half way through. You have perseverance.

You are not very skilful, and believes you are dependent and weak minded yourself. You have great talent in coming up with new ideas and creating things.

You have will power to challenge anything, but tend to lack the last push. mYou don't become inpatient even if you are put in a difficult situation.

You have a capacity to find a way to overcome a difficulty with calm. Your negotiation tactics are brilliant.

In daily life, you are influenced by your preferences, and may act unreasonably. You are also calculative, and become persistent.

Nevertheless, you are sociable person, and can be passionate on things you do.
You have a quality to be a leader.

You are rich in originality, and can come up with new ideas from existing things.
You can find better ways from them.

After marriage, you can be obsessed with your children's education. You may find something worthwhile to do out side your home.

Try it yourself at http://world.doubutsu-uranai.com/result.php

人生的失去

有些东西我不想等到失去了才来后悔。因为有些东西失去了，就无法挽回。

有些东西如钱财等失去了，你还能再去赚回。但人的生命却是永远地消失，永远都无法挽回。

到那时才来后悔有很多东西还没跟身边关心你和你关心的人做，很多话还没说，都己经太晚了。因为他(她)永远都不会在回到你身边。

Song on my blog...

I got many friends reading my blog asking me about the music piece that is playing in the background...

Very nice right?? Hehehe.. I like it alot myself personally... and I am glad so many people share the same sentiments as I do...

The title of the music piece is "Kiss The Rain".. the writer is a Korean pianist by the name of Yiruma...to know more about him, you can check out this website http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yiruma. He do have his own fansite at www.yiruma.com.. however that is all in Korean.. so I didnt bother to check through it...

Other than this music piece, he has various other works that are also very nice, smoothing and beautiful... You can listen to some of his works here at http://www.91blog.com/user1/1072/archives/2005/5363.shtml and http://www.myspace.com/yiruma

Enjoy folks...

Bad dream at night vs fear in reality

Yesterday night I had a very bad dream...

I dreamt of the following scenario .............

It was a long boring day and I was alone at home... surfing through the net ... looking through some popular gal's blog (who I dunno and I am not personal frenz with)... there is this new blog entry about the writer meeting up with a guy that she really like... they went on a date today to the seaside.... she was writing about how much she love this guy... how well this guy treat her... how much fun they have together.... and right after the trip to the beach... they went to take neoprints together... she had attached the neoprints to the blog entry.... scrolling down through the pictures.. I saw a familiar face...

I know the guy in the neoprints.. the exact same guy I have spent my life with, the exact same guy I have taken my marriage vows with.... how can it be? Maybe it is just another guy who looks alike... maybe it is not him..... maybe .............

Thoughts flashes through my mind as I continue staring at the neoprints..... he has been coming home late due to work... he said he has been very busy..... he hasnt been spending much time at home even during weekends... we no longer go out together... we no longer eat dinner together..... we no longer have any physical contacts.. but but his work has been busy... i cant blame him for being so busy and tired due to nature of his work can't I?.... I never dare to call or msg him at work... it wouldnt be nice to disturb him when he is so busy handling so many other things.... and i trusted him not to lie or cheat on me.... he said he will never do anything like that.... then who is this guy in the prints then??

Tonight I waited for him to come home.... again he was home late around midnight... the same routine happen tonight as with many other nights.. he went into the shower and then straight to bed... both of us never speak... everything happen in silence... so silent I can hear the wind blowing from the airconditioner.... the room suddenly seem so cold....... and me... I suddenly feel the pangs of loneliness haunting me from the shadows... maybe he is tired from a rough day of work.. in the silence, I finally mustered out the courage to ask... "on XX day & XX mth.. did u go out with ABC gal?" He turned around and stared at me in the eyes... "why did u ask?"... I replied in a shiver "I saw neoprints of you and her on her blog".. he turned on his back.. looking at the ceiling he replied "so you found out................"

My mind turned blank..... I wanted to cry but I can't............. my heart feel cold even though it is already in bits and pieces... that wasnt what I wanted to hear... I wanted to hear the word no... I wanted some comforting words to tell me that he still love me... and he will always do... like in the past.... he promised to love me forever till eternity... he made a promise that nothing of such sorts will ever happen to me... then why is it happening now..?? Did i do something wrong... if not why he love another gal now......... what does the ger have that i dun... why he dun love me anymore... why did he tell me he is busy at work.... we are married... we took the vows to stay with each other through all ups and downs in life, till death do us part... have he forgotten all about that?? why cant he just hug me like in the past and asked me not to think too much.... that everything is going to be ok and alright....

In the midst of my thoughts he said "you should have realised long ago that this marriage is gone.. there are no longer feelings between us... there is no way we can continue living like this anymore u know... why dun we just get a divorce and relieve each other of the heavy load... at least we might be happier... and maybe you will find someone better"... is this the end?? after so many years of marriage... this is all it has come to?? what should I do? what can I do??

I woke up at 4am in the morning in sweat.. even though my air con is switched on at 23 degrees celsius. People say dreams represent fear in real life... in the day whatever you think of, whatever you are afraid of.. it remains in your sub conscious resulting in dreams at night... and yes I do agree to that... because I do have a fear of losing you.... just like someone clinging on to the edge of a cliff... I feel myself clinging on to you...... our occasional conversations involving pretty & beautiful gals with good figures further add on to my insecurity.. resulting in the downs of my confidence level ......... External beauty is something that I do not have and can never provide.... yet I find my inner beauty diminishing with all the negatives thoughts and fears.... questions seem to forever run hrough my head.. how long can I hold you for? will I ever lose you from my side....? will things like that ever happen.. maybe not now.. what about in the future... 10 years, 20 years, 30 years, 40 years down the road?

I guess I will never know the answer till the day I die... but it did make me sleepless for now...

Marriage...

everyone is getting married... when is it my turn!!!

can you guys wait for me or not?? why all run ahead one sia... maybe we can have a double or a mass wedding ma... that will be so fun loh... at least help me to save a few bucks in the pocket.. wahahaha

coming to end of the year... i got 3 wedding invitations one after another... this does not include people i know is getting married and whose weddings i am not invited to loh... including that will make a total of 6!!

incredible sia... hehehe

hmm... on my side lei.. i am still deciding between a car or a wedding..?? hahaha... wah piangz what kind of choices are that sia... it is now or never loh.. you either buy a car and postpone the marriage plans or get married but forget about the car...

hmm.. after serious thinking and consideration.. i think i will stick with the car for now... wahahahaha... for those who are pain-stakingly waiting for my wedding invitation, who keep on asking when am I getting married... do you mind buying me a car first..?? a small KIA Picanto will do... hehehe.. then I will get married immediately... hehehe

Daddy Birthday..

On the 19th October this year, we had a grand celebration for my daddy's birthday. This year with a new addition to the family.. my dar! Hehe.. anyway he is already considered part of the family sooner or later... *orh dar dar*

We went out for dinner at Blk 306. Just a simple dinner with seafood, spare ribs, assam fish head, yam and veggies. Was thinking of Crystal Jade actually but thought otherwise. Anyway it was a cheap and tasty alternative considering that we might be paying for the bill at the end of the meal.. ultimately we didnt.. becoz my dar lost the battle with my stubborn daddy.. haha...

Then while walking back home from Blk 306, we stopped by "the Cake Shop" at Marsiling Mrt to buy him a cake... daddy just keep on insisting that he dun wan a cake.. but anyway we went ahead regardless his constant reminder... SO we brought the following cake (see below).. quite special I suppose.. considering that it is chocolate and peppermint.. actually i am not a fan of mint.. but I just thought it is a good change as compared to the usual chocolate, cream and fruit cakes that we have been eating for so many years... taste is still ok.. although my mum complained it to be a little too sweet...

 
 
My daddy with his cake 
And in the morning of his birthday, we last min decided to order a birthday present for him (which happens to be the second most expensive present I have ever gotten for my daddy so far.. the most expensive was a hotel stay at Marina Mandarin a couple of years ago when somehow I got a discount voucher for that hotel.. this of coz does not take into account the expensive dinners we had the previous years)... anyway this year me and dar decided on a table fountain named Cascading Waterfall from Far East Flora.. ordered that over the Internet and rushed to have it delivered the same day... I like it alot... I think it is very beautiful... what do you think??.. maybe because all along I always have a soft spot for anything to do with water....

 
  

Contentment

On 18th Oct 2006, a 40 years old Chinese man died after jumping into e tracks of an incoming MRT train at Chinese Garden. Behind e tragedy unfolds a truly heart breaking story.

The deceased n his family were ants (becoz they were very poor) living in e rich materialistic realistic world of Singapore. Money is an important factor, never to do without. Food, water, shelter education all need to be brought with money. How much you get depends on how much money you have. The more e merrier of coz.

E family of 4 survived on a bare min of $1400 for a double income n $500 when e deceased loses his job. Here i am complaining that my pay (of similar range to their double income) is never enough for myself.

They lived in a 3 room flat with e bare essentials. A dining table, a study table, a small tv, matresses for a bed, a wardrode n fans were basically so much of what they have. They often have to go hungry n often only get to survive on maggie mee. They can't afford anything much more than the necessary essentials. N here i am complaining that i wan more features in my room (including a larger bed, a water feature, a bigger wardrode etc) and tasty foods in expensive restaurants. N never once in my life have i tasted the pangs of hunger.

I think i or we should really re think about how lucky we are to have all that we have and all that we have achieved. There are people out there who survived n live days by days on e bare min n here we are chasing the ever more gains.

Love in my life...

I am not e most perfect person in this world... Maybe I am e most inperfect one. Indeed I do have flaws in me... Alot in fact....

But I am so glad that in my past 23 (coming to 24) years of life journey, I have found so much love in my life. Love from my family, love from my frenz, love from my darling especially.

Thank you all for loving me for who I am, despite all my flaws. Just like a mountain flower accompanying a ugly looking rock high up e snow capped mountains.. You all shine up my life... And make me feel that life is so precious and beautiful... That I never ever want to risk losing you in my life

KL & Cameron Trip Pics

Hey guys.. I am back from my second road trip to Genting Highlands... however I am only posting the pics from my first road trip as there is so much editing to do.. I have to shrink each photo by 1/2 and rename it accordingly to order because there are just too many photos (over 200 photos taken in total).. some super doppy meaningless and some super doppy ugly to be shown to the rest of the world man..

There will be even more photos from Genting Highlands trip (over 300 photos taken in total).. me and dar are super vain kids.. snapping photos everywhere... but we both enjoyed ourselves alot really... hehe.. love that guy so muchy..

Anyway here's the photos from KL and Cameron Highlands..(I wonder how long does it take to load 46 photos to Blogger.. they are super slow sia) *sigh*

Full Moon seen at Tuas on Mid Autumn Festival 
Me on the bus 
Supper upon arrival at KL *the food sucks* 
Our transport for the trip 
Preparing to set off to Cameron Highlands 
Me all set to go 
On the way to Cameron Highlands 
Beautiful scenary along the way 
First stop - Strawberry Farm 
Rows & rows of strawberries 
Eat me eat me... I am fresh and ripe... 
Second stop - Hydroponic vegetables farm 
Look at the vegetables.. green and leafy 
My parents with a very unwillingly Brandon 
Group photo - My parents, my auntie and my cousins
 
My turn now 
Third stop - Some ulu flower farm / garden 
A beauty among the flower *yucks I can't believe I just said that* 
My mum in a very old fashioned pose 
Fourth stop - Cameron Valley tea plantation 
Beautiful patches of greenery 
Group photo 
Me at the tea plantation * I wonder why my eyes are so mini man* 
Fifth stop - Rose Valley 
They really grow very nice beautiful flowers there
 
It's me again.. can't resist the flowers
 
In the midst of flowers (and bees!!)
 
I told you before, this is a super old fashioned pose invented in the 70th century..demonstrated by my daddy again
 
My parents everlasting love in the midst of flowers 
Now.. you see how big the rose is?? 
Sixth stop - BOH tea plantation 
Beautiful shot of the green.. * I believe my camera skills are improving.. wahaha* 
They are super doopy rich.. the entire mountains and valleys belong to them alone. all covered with tea 
Yes.. tea again... 
Mid way up the hill *super tiring climbing up the hill slope to reach to the resting area sia* 
Finally I am at the top!! 
They have a super nice resting place overlooking the huge plantations.. I think I can sit there forever.. enjoying a hot cup of lychee tea in the cold weather.. shiok sia 
My uncle insist on taking this photo for me... hmm... I happen to be wearing green too eh.. hehe 
Greenhill Resort at Cameron Highlands 
The backview of Greenhill Resort 
Me at Greenhill Resort.. by the way we got it free thanks to my uncle membership card 
Ok last stop - tea plantation again.. I told you that is all they are famous for... strawberries, veggies and tea.. the entire place is covered with them... 
Group photo at the tea plantation.. 
They too have a nice resting area but too bad we are rushing off so we didnt manage to stop for a cup of tea 
The tea plantation is not as nice and tidy as BOH though.. look at it closely in comparsion 
Anyway who cares whether it is neat or not.. take photos first 
Lata Iskander Falls 
Lata Iskander Falls - up close and personal 
Me at the Falls... can you see I am feeling a bit sick then?? The road down from Cameron Highlands really kills man.. make me sick all the way down 
My parents at the Falls 
A very nice restaurant where we stop by for dinner at Kuala Selangor on the way to the Kuantan Fireflies Resort 
It is located on the edge of a river.. super beautiful 
Happen to see a monkey there...so took a photo too 
Sunset at Kuala Selangor 
Very nice sky near the seaside 
Beautiful colours in the sky signifying the end of my trip 
Ending off with the photo of the 3 kids... haha  

By the way.. it took me 3 hours just to upload the photos... the haze is smelly, I am sweating like crazy... super tiring